Go with the wind...

Isn't easy (less conflict)sometimes to go with the wind rather than resisting it... does it give a chance to see why there is a conflict ???

Let it be ?

It is strange some times... There are people who knows you only for a few days, but the care they show would make you think that you know them for a long time.. There are people who knows you for a long time but they don't care... May be that they know about me that is why they don't care ? I cannot answer it myself..

It makes you think some times, It makes you worry and not think most of the times. Some time I leave things as they are like the way it is mentioned in The Beatles song... Let it Be... (When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, Speaking words of wisdom, let it be). Some times I do get angry.. Some times I get upset...

It is true - The Alchemist - "When someone sees the same people every day, they wind up becoming a part of that person's life. And then they want the person to change. If someone isn't what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own"

I feel the same.. I hope I take the lesson too...

Best Friend?

I am not having any good friends for years now. I don't know if I have changed or just that I didn't get any one. Being in US and away from family and back from India vacation, it is more frustrating for me to not have good friends to talk. Just to talk.
In the past years, people I thought as my good friends turned out to be the other way. Now in a stage that I have to do something about it.

I will be on the roads

Finally, I bought my first two wheeler, a Honda Activa. The main reason that I went for it is that, any body in my family can use it. I have to weight for a month for the vehicle because the demand is some much for it. Honda guys told that Activa and Unicorn is having a consistent market. Chennai people should be more watchful because another absent minded will be on the roads..

Quote from Azim

Azim Premji in an interview quoted the below lines when talking about the impact on BPO requirements due to US Economy Slowdown:

"When you are under pressure you make the bold steps faster, you don't make the bold steps slower."

Some times Quotes without the context at which it was said doesn't give the exact meaning, but this could be taken individually.

My own experience of the quote but at a very very smaller level
Last week Friday, suddenly, I have decided to leave by 6 and the time is now 5:30 and lots of work do within that time. I have to send a "political" email as well, which I started only by 6:05. I typed the complete e-mail at a stretch and sent it. After some time I thought that I sent it in a hurry, but content came out boldly. I usually send mails in a sugar quoted way. Today I opened the replies and it has reached every body in the correct sense. May be if I would have thought more, I don't know whether the same words would have come. But it doesn't mean that you always have to type mails in a hurry. It just happened this time!!!

Tare Zameen Par

Yesterday, I watched Tare Zamin Par (Don't you see it is contracting from my previous post? I could some what understand Hindi) . Excellent movie. One of the movies where the story follows the single thread. I also happen to see "Pay it forward" couple of weeks back. Again, It is very well evident that how a teacher could change his student's life. It is one of the profession I always have huge respect and one day I will go back to school again.

Tho dhus rupaiya

I never felt so bad about not knowing Hindi till I went to US. People from every other state at least understands Hindi. Most of my friends / colleagues know Hindi and I miss lot of funny conversations.

Another incident happened @ Delhi Airport during immigration check. I gave my passport to the immigration office. He started asking some questions in Hindi. I said I do not know Hindi. He replied, aren't you an Indian ?. What should I reply ? I replied to him politely that I am from Tamil Nadu and Hindi is not taught in the normal schools ( I meant Government Schools).

Hindi was never taught in the Government Schools along with Tamil. Tamil is one of the oldest Language and I am happy that Tamil is my mother tongue. Kaveri Valley Civilization is equivalent to the great Indus Valley Civilization. I am fortunate enough to read and know the ancient tamil literature.

I know I am not the only person who doesn't know Hindi in Tamil Nadu.

One of my friend went to Mumbai. He went to buy something and he want to get that for Rs.20. But he only knows "dhus rupaiya" (Rs 10), so he asked it for "Tho Thus rupaiya" (two ten Rupee).

All thanks goes to the so called great politicians of Tamil Nadu. Is there any harm in teaching the country's National Language ?

Trip to Masinagudi

Friday:-

We (our project team) planned to go for a trip to Masinagudi and its adjacent locations. We started by a Friday night to Coimbatore. Unfortunately, we got only the Mangalore mail (train), due to our late decision to go for a trip. The problem about Mangalore Mail is, it is the train which traverses the furthest path to reach Coimbatore from Chennai. Its departure time is 10:00 PM. Whenever, I have to catch a bus/train, I will reach there half-an-hour earlier. Fear!!!. But, this time even worse, I got there by 9'O clock. I called up other folks to know where they are. Most of them have just started. Announcement at Egmore railway station told, train is going to arrive at platform 5. I went to platform and found a comfortable place. I got my Mp3 player fully loaded for the tour. Now, I am hearing Mozart's collection. By 9:30, other folks started arriving "The Marriage of the Figaro" got interrupted.
I was directing every one of them to platform 5. Our 3rd class A/C coach is at the tail end of the train. We walked a long distance to catch my coach. Now, Time is 9:50. Till, some of our guys had to reach the station. One colleague called me, to know the direction of our coach. I clearly directed them the opposite way. I took me some time to realize that I have shown them a wrong direction. Then, I was running and mobiling (??-New term) the colleague. Found them and directed towards the right direction. (Asadu Vazinchathu thaan micham).

All set. Train started. We were busy asking others to exchange places, since we all like to sit in the same compartment. We succeeded a bit in that. We played cards for some time. Got bored. Then, we played Dumb C. After that, every gone to sleep (I didn't remember the time). Third class A/C is well maintained. So, I can able to sleep well.

Saturday:-

I got up by 7:30 AM and freshened up. Like most of the south Indian, I like to have a sip of coffee every morning. So, I bought a coffee at Erode Junction. As usual, it is the worst. By the time, one my colleague's husband bought "Appams" for breakfast. I never know it was Appam (Never seen an Appam before). I thought it was a big Dosa. While eating, somebody told me it is an "Appam". Anyway, had a good break fast!!

Most of the time, I was enjoying the nature by sitting next to a window. I like those places, bored of seeing buildings and flats in Chennai. Always, I like this part of the state. We reached Coimbatore by 12 Noon, I guess.
We had a Tempo traveler ready to pick us from the station, for the entire trip. We went to one of my colleague's house at Coimbatore. We freshened up there. We got some 15 minutes time in between, and we found a rubber ball. So, we were playing tennis with our hand in the space in front of the house. We started by 3:00 PM and collected our lunch parcel which we have ordered. It is a video coach vehicle. So, we were listening to Songs, some movies (Verrachami - T.Rajendher special - he heee.. Can't able to see that for more than 10 mins). We reached Masinagudi by 8 or 9 PM, I guess. We traveled up to Ooty and got down the other side to reach Masingudi.

The Log house in Masingudi was superb. But only two rooms were there. I along with some guys have to go to Masinagudi Guest house, which is little away from the log house. Dinner was good at log house. Chapatti and some dal as side dish. Non Vegetarian folks had chicken. We were planning for a drive through the road to see elephants crossing the road. So, we planned to keep our bags at Masingudi Guest house and then started with our ride. But, the person there unwilling to give us a key for the door, which was pathetic. There is another door inside for which he gave the key. But, we have to wake them up to get in. We cancelled our plan and two of us stayed in the guest house cursing the fellow. We were planning for a trekking into the forest, so we kept the alarm at 5:30 AM next morning.

Sunday:-

Alarm rang. I was thinking, why Alarm got rung this early and checked the time. It was 5:30 AM. I went to have a bath. It is the strangest of the bathroom, with 4 doors. I don't know why they have four doors for a bathroom. Fortunately, hot water facility was there. Otherwise, I would have frozen. I was trying to open the tab to get the cold water. The tab came along with my hand and water splashed directly from the pipe. (Got frightened a bit). We started for trekking at 6:15 AM. A Jeep picked us up and left at a place along with a local village guy. We walked into the forest (mostly plains). We saw couple of elephants. Our guide was warning that we should approach that area, so we 4 along with the guide moved towards another direction.
One of our brave colleagues was taking photographs of an elephant which passed that way, without knowing another one is hiding and looking at him straight. It slowly approached towards him. Realizing the danger, he turned towards us, thinking that we are near. We were standing at a farther distance, he came running towards us. I am also watching that elephant and suddenly saw a rapid movement of the elephant and also saw that my colleague was running towards us. I also ran looking at elephant's direction, but the elephant was running in the opposite direction.

This is the only adventure we had during the 5 KM trekking. We heard about the dangerous bears that may come. We never saw one. We saw only monkeys and elephants. The guide took us only through plains. I think he should have known the danger in going into dense areas. Just before reaching the road, we all frightened seeing a pig, thinking it as a bear. Any way trekking is over. We planned to go for another trekking in hilly areas the next day.

We went back to the log house. I didn't see the neighborhood of the log house in the previous night. But now I can able to see it very clearly. Simply Beautiful. A small pond, surrounded by greens.

Then we all ate breakfast and left the log house by 12:00 to Thepakkadu which is nearer to Masinagudi. During the transit, we saw a tied elephant in the road side. We all stopped and took a photo with the elephant in the back drop. Then I saw a beautiful some kind of cottage near a stream. I wished I should have been there, but never imagined we are heading towards that place. Wow!!! What a place... Just wandered around for some time to feel the beauty of that place.. I gone down to the stream and sat at a broken tree trunk, which held its place little into the stream.. It was soothing to hear the water flowing sound.. My colleagues got attracted for what I did.. They all came down there...We took some snaps there...

Now, the lunch is ready. We had a good lunch at Theppakadu log house; we all set for the Safari ride into Mudhumalai forest. It started raining and we started entering the forest in a van.

First, we saw a bunch of elephants very close. One medium sized elephant got little agitated by our arrival and it threatened us with a sound.. The reason I think was there is a baby elephant in the crowd, they all were surrounding that. We saw some more elephants and lots of spotted deer. We returned back. It was raining a bit and that evening time is the best time to hear Bach Brandenburg concerto. The environment really suited and I enjoyed the concertos a lot than before. Our plan for campfire got shattered due to rain, we stayed in the log house, playing some fun games.. We had dinner, again I had to leave to a separate dormitory (which is little away from a log house) due to lack of space at log house.

We three went there at around 10:30 PM and opened it. One guy wanted to return to log house, so he locked us outside and went. My freighted friend don't want to switch of the lights.

Monday:-

I slept well due to tiredness. Suddenly, woke up and recognized that lights are off. I thought another colleague went to log house returned back and switched off the lights. Then only I recognized he was not there and it was a power cut. Time now is 2:30 AM; we were planning for another trekking in the morning. I recognized sound of a chain hearing constantly, suddenly fear struck me. I was thinking on why the sound is coming suddenly. Then, after some time I heard a bell sound. Then only I recognized, it is a elephant tide to a nearby tree. (I confirmed that next day morning.)

It was raining, so our trekking plans were cancelled. No hot bath due to power cut. I was the first guy to try the very cold water bath. I came out with flying colors. We had our breakfast, started packing to leave the place. We started by 12:00 PM. We stopped at a road side tea shop when traveling toward Ooty. At the shop is well placed in a hair pin bend. Then, we had our break fast at Ooty. It was very very cold there at 3:00 PM. I had another beautiful vegetarian lunch. Non vegetarian people went to a separate restaurant and they returned very late. Meanwhile, I was watching Sura Samharam (A Kamal Hassan movie) in the van. Once the reached, we started to Connor tea estate. We all watched "Unnale Unnale" while traveling. The movie really jelled with the climate and it set the completeness for the whole tour. I enjoyed watching it. We bought some tea packets at Cunnor tea estate and hurried back to Coimbatore. We had to catch 10:00 PM train.

Tour was over. We reached Chennai at 7:30 PM on Tuesday morning and hurried back to office, to compensate our absence on Monday.

Change..

Lot of changes in my environment for past 1 month. Switched to a new project where everybody is new to me. Switched my work timings. Nobody to chat while drinking coffee, lunch or dinner. Missing all my previous mates and friends. . With the kind of work schedule, can't able to meet them regularly even if we work in a same company and same location.

Seeing a friend after a long time gives such a joy. I felt that today. I met one of my dearest friends after such a long time. Sweet little meet, because both of us have to be back to our corresponding workplaces quickly. That happiness showed in the work I did today.

Life moves on, isn't it? New project, new surroundings, new set of people…. One way it is very interesting. We all have our priorities, don’t we…

Patience or Comfort Zone

I didn't write a blog entry for quite some time. Just thought, why didn't I write for quite sometime? I always have a lot of things to say and speak about, because I am passionate about lot of things technology, music, football...

I have more balance in my life. These days, you know, I am more satisfied with things I have. Sometimes, a thought pops up: Why don't you go out of your comfort zone and current life.... If not now, when? What are you waiting for?

I dunno whether I have lot of patience or I am very much in my comfort zone...????

Memento 2006

Sitting in my front of my PC, I would like to recollect my best and worst moments of 2006.

. Couple of my friends got married. I went to their marriage with a big gang and enjoyed well.

. Went to Ilayaraja’s live show and a Western classical show, enjoyed the atmosphere and music (obviously).

. Had my first stage performance with my Guitar.

. Watched some good movies like Shawshank Redemption, Forrest Gump, Rang de basanthi etc.

. Read some good books like The Alchemist, Jonathan Livingston seagull, The Fountain Head etc. These books made me to look life from a different perspective.

. Watched football World Cup (Bought Set-Top box for this) with my heart following the great players. Who can forget Zizu’s magical feet and head (butt)?

. Shifted my house to a nice place, near to my grand ma’s house (I like to be there with my “patti” (grand ma). Due to this, change in “Guitar Master” too. But a progressive change.

. Resumed contact with my old friends. Thanks to Orkut!

. Lot of changes in the friends’ circle (at work). Lot of people left the company.

. Had to make lot of tough decisions with respect to my career. Some are progressive, but some are not. This is the year I started to think about moving towards finding a job I like. Will continue that in 2007. Hopefully I will find it this year.

. Had a chance to work with worst possible colleagues.

As a whole it was a year with different experiences and different feelings as well!!!

Happy New Year!!!

Money, Money, Money...

Our predecessors are true, when they said, “How much money we get, it is not enough.” When it comes to money, I believe there are two things

Ø Increases your means to get more money or
Ø Spend less.

Mostly, it is ‘either or’ kind of thing. Mostly we are taught to do the latter. Monthly I have to track where I am spending the most and try to reduce it the next time. I have computerized (being a software engineer, I can use the technology wherever I need it) my spending, Tax stuffs as Excel Sheets (We can do a lot of stuffs with these simple excel sheets). We plan money for something and it will go for some other thing. There is a John Lennon told, “Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.” It is true not only with respect to money, isn’t it?

It is not wrong trying to get money you want. But the compromises we make to get that money, determines whether we enjoy getting that money or not. Money was made as an evil thing by people who made it as a measurement of a Man’s status. (Here, Money also includes material wealth).

I am trying to live a life where I live for my needs, to some extent to my family’s needs and not for others. I am already trying and I hope I will continue. There are lots of people around you who ask, “You didn’t buy a land, house, car, bike and every other stuff they saw in another software engineer’s house.”

As said in The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho, “In the long run, what people think about shepherds and bakers becomes more important for them than their own destinies.” I have to overcome the thought about me, “What others think about me?” These are all the thoughts which I am fighting for. I know it is worth fighting.

I got little advice from elderly people that “when we get more money or when we move up the ranks in work, Humbleness should be there”. That’s true, isn’t it, I am trying my best to live humbly.

About my guitar performances on stage

Last couple of weeks was hectic. Suddenly we have to practice for 5 songs in 2 weeks time after my first guitar performance. So, I didn't find time to write about my first performance. It was a decent one, considering that I forgot notes while starting a stanza. But, I picked the next line correctly. It was unfortunate that Microphone didn't work properly.

We got only couple of weeks time to practice the songs for the second performance. Even though I am learning guitar for the past 1 and half year or so, the task is a very difficult one. Suddenly, I have to play 5 songs. The problem is, I am not that great at following the tempo of the songs. Need more experience in that.

I had to practice a lot and had some good rehearsal. Not enough for me to give the confidence. My fingers are almost gone, the day before the performance. I was little more tensed then the first performance. Actually, I was playing along with other two guitarists. Cool Guys! My tension was far minimum, we used to crack jokes till we enter the stage.

Anyway, my second performance was completed. One song (Churaliya, old hindhi song) was total flop. Rest of the songs are not bad, I forgot the notes in each and every song. But I managed decently. Overall, 'kanne kalaimanee' was the top. We got great response from the crowd, so I think we played well.

I worked hard, but the result was not that satisfactory for me. With Respect to Music, hard work is not directly proportional to what you do on stage. Isn’t it?

I was more relieved yesterday night, after the performance. Roamed around my place, hearing some good music (got a good Mp3 player), just to relax. Quite an experience doing rehearsals and playing on stage……

What a Feeling

‘What a Feeling’ to hear the song – ‘What a Feeling’ from the movie: Flashdance. The song got the Academy Award for the best song in 1983. Flashdance is a movie about a construction worker who wants to be a dancer. I didn't see it yet. But I read through wiki.

I heard the song many a times before. But when I came to know about the story line behind the song, I downloaded the lyrics and got really excited about the lyrics. I think I am hearing this song for the 100th time, when I am typing this now.

Following lines I like the most,

First, when there's nothing but a slow glowing dream
That your fear seems to hide deep inside your mind

Well I hear the music, close my eyes, feel the rhythm
In a flash it takes hold of my heart

Take your passion, and make it happen

I can’t able to switch to any other song now.

You can download the song at esnips.com, search for flashdance.

Also, it got a very good video. Thanks to the broadband connection these days. I downloaded the video in half an hour through peer to peer file sharing software. Also, you can watch the song in http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXpZ9SjWRGI.

The Hope

Some of the dialogue about HOPE in my Favorite Favourite movie: Shawshank Redemption

ANDY to RED: That there are things in this world not carved out of gray stone. That there's a small place inside of us they can never lock away, and that place is called hope.

ANDY to RED: Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies. I will be hoping that this letter finds you, and finds you well. Your friend. Andy.

RED: I find I am so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it is the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain... I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope.

While my Guitar gently weeps

Either it was ‘The Beatles’ or ‘Eric Clapton’ sung it; the song is a superb one. Such a catchy title, isn’t it? Anyways, I am not going to talk about it.

It’s about me and my Guitar. I am going to perform this week on stage for the first time. The song I going to play ‘Saare Jahan Se achaa’ along with two other guitarist and one tabala. I have lot of fear, since it is going to be my first stage performance.

Yesterday, I struggled a lot to follow the tempo of the ‘Tabala’ player. The ‘Tabala’ player is just 12 or 13 years old. But, he is playing it with such an ease. I am quite amazed about these kids.

Finally, after two hours of rehearsal, I got somewhat right. Just one more rehearsal left. But the thing, the feeling of playing along with others is quite a unique experience. I enjoyed playing with others. It is such a great feeling. Fingers pained for every one of us. But still we continued for more rehearsals. That pain doesn’t matter, end of the rehearsal we all are satisfied.

My struggle of keeping my hobby alive for the past couple of years is at last started giving good experiences. It is such a great struggle to keeping my interest alive, so far. And, it is going to be difficult I know that. But I have the confidence of managing it, because I already balanced between work and my hobby so far (for almost 2 years) very well.

But the full fruit of it, I didn’t get yet. It is in my reach. I should play well on Sunday to reach it. Let’s see????!!!!

QUALITY

Following short story was forwarded to me by my friend. It is a suberb story and worth reading it.....

QUALITY by John Galsworthy

I knew him from the days of my extreme youth, because he made my father's boots; inhabiting with his elder brother two little shops let into one, in a small by-street-now no more, but then most fashionably placed in the West End.

That tenement had a certain quiet distinction; there was no sign upon its face that he made for any of the Royal Family--merely his own German name of Gessler Brothers; and in the window a few pairs of boots. I remember that it always troubled me to account for those unvarying boots in the window, for he made only what was ordered, reaching nothing down, and it seemed so inconceivable that what he made could ever have failed to fit. Had he bought them to put there?
That, too, seemed inconceivable. He would never have tolerated in his house leather on which he had not worked himself. Besides, they were too beautiful--the pair of pumps, so inexpressibly slim, the patent leathers with cloth tops, making water come into one's mouth, the tall brown riding boots with marvelous sooty glow, as if, though new, they had been worn a hundred years. Those pairs could only have been made by one who saw before him the Soul of Boot--so truly were they prototypes incarnating the very spirit of all foot-gear. These thoughts, of course, came to me later, though even when I was promoted to him, at the age of perhaps fourteen, some inkling haunted me of the dignity of himself and brother. For to make boots—such boots as he made--seemed to me then, and still seems to me, mysterious and wonderful.

I remember well my shy remark, one day, while stretching out to him my youthful foot:
"Isn't it awfully hard to do, Mr. Gessler?"

And his answer, given with a sudden smile from out of the sardonic redness of his beard: "Id is an Ardt!"

Himself, he was a little as if made from leather, with his yellow crinkly face, and crinkly reddish
hair and beard; and neat folds slanting down his cheeks to the corners of his mouth, and his guttural and one-toned voice; for leather is a sardonic substance, and stiff and slow of purpose. And that was the character of his face, save that his eyes, which were grey-blue, had in them the simple gravity of one secretly possessed by the Ideal. His elder brother was so very like him--though watery, paler in every way, with a great industry--that sometimes in early days I was not quite sure of him until the interview was over. Then I knew that it was he, if the words, "I will ask my brudder," had not been spoken; and that, if they had, it was his elder brother.
When one grew old and wild and ran up bills, one somehow never ran them up with Gessler Brothers. It would not have seemed becoming to go in there and stretch out one's foot to that blue iron-spectacled glance, owing him for more than--say--two pairs, just the comfortable reassurance that one was still his client.

For it was not possible to go to him very often--his boots lasted terribly, having something beyond the temporary--some, as it were, essence of boot stitched into them.
One went in, not as into most shops, in the mood of: "Please serve me, and let me go!" but restfully, as one enters a church; and, sitting on the single wooden chair, waited--for there was never anybody there. Soon, over the top edge of that sort of well—rather dark, and smelling soothingly of leather--which formed the shop, there would be seen his face, or that of his elder brother, peering down. A guttural sound, and the tip-tap of bast slippers beating the narrow wooden stairs, and he would stand before one without coat, a little bent, in leather apron, with sleeves turned back, blinking--as if awakened from some dream of boots, or like an owl surprised in daylight and annoyed at this interruption.

And I would say: "How do you do, Mr. Gessler? Could you make me a pair of Russia leather boots?"

Without a word he would leave me, retiring whence he came, or into the other portion of the shop, and I would, continue to rest in the wooden chair, inhaling the incense of his trade. Soon he would come back, holding in his thin, veined hand a piece of gold-brown leather. With eyes fixed on it, he would remark: "What a beaudiful biece!" When I, too, had admired it, he would speak again. "When do you wand dem?" And I would answer: "Oh! As soon as you conveniently can." And he would say: "To-morrow fordnighd?" Or if he were his elder brother: "I will ask my brudder!"

Then I would murmur: "Thank you! Good-morning, Mr. Gessler." "Goot- morning!" he would reply, still looking at the leather in his hand. And as I moved to the door, I would hear the tip-tap of his bast slippers restoring him, up the stairs, to his dream of boots. But if it were some new kind of foot-gear that he had not yet made me, then indeed he would observe ceremony--divesting me of my boot and holding it long in his hand, looking at it with eyes at once critical and loving, as if recalling the glow with which he had created it, and rebuking the way in which one had disorganized this masterpiece. Then, placing my foot on a piece of paper, he would two or three times tickle the outer edges with a pencil and pass his nervous fingers over my toes, feeling himself into the heart of my requirements.

I cannot forget that day on which I had occasion to say to him; "Mr.Gessler, that last pair of town walking-boots creaked, you know."

He looked at me for a time without replying, as if expecting me to withdraw or qualify the statement, then said:

"Id shouldn'd 'ave greaked."

"It did, I'm afraid."

"You goddem wed before dey found demselves?"

"I don't think so."

At that he lowered his eyes, as if hunting for memory of those boots, and I felt sorry I had mentioned this grave thing.

"Zend dem back!" he said; "I will look at dem."

A feeling of compassion for my creaking boots surged up in me, so well could I imagine the sorrowful long curiosity of regard which he would bend on them.

"Zome boods," he said slowly, "are bad from birdt. If I can do noding wid dem, I dake dem off your bill."

Once (once only) I went absent-mindedly into his shop in a pair of boots bought in an emergency at some large firm's. He took my order without showing me any leather, and I could feel his eyes penetrating the inferior integument of my foot. At last he said:

"Dose are nod my boods."

The tone was not one of anger, nor of sorrow, not even of contempt, but there was in it something quiet that froze the blood. He put his hand down and pressed a finger on the place where the left boot, endeavouring to be fashionable, was not quite comfortable.

"Id 'urds you dere,", he said. "Dose big virms 'ave no self-respect. Drash!" And then, as if something had given way within him, he spoke long and bitterly. It was the only time I ever heard him discuss the conditions and hardships of his trade.

"Dey get id all," he said, "dey get id by adverdisement, nod by work. Dey dake it away from us,
who lofe our boods. Id gomes to this-- bresently I haf no work. Every year id gets less you will see." And looking at his lined face I saw things I had never noticed before, bitter things and bitter struggle--and what a lot of grey hairs there seemed suddenly in his red beard!
As best I could, I explained the circumstances of the purchase of those ill-omened boots. But his face and voice made so deep impression that during the next few minutes I ordered many pairs. Nemesis fell! They lasted more terribly than ever. And I was not able conscientiously to go to him for nearly two years.

When at last I went I was surprised to find that outside one of the two little windows of his shop another name was painted, also that of a bootmaker - making, of course, for the Royal Family. The old familiar boots, no longer in dignified isolation, were huddled in the single window. Inside, the now contracted well of the one little shop was more scented and darker than ever. And it was longer than usual, too, before a face peered down, and the tip-tap of the bast slippers began. At last he stood before me, and, gazing through those rusty iron spectacles, said:

"Mr.-----, isn'd it?"

"Ah! Mr. Gessler," I stammered, "but your boots are really too good, you know! See, these are quite decent still!" And I stretched out to him my foot. He looked at it.

"Yes," he said, "beople do nod wand good boods, id seems."

To get away from his reproachful eyes and voice I hastily remarked: "What have you done to your shop?"

He answered quietly: "Id was too exbensif. Do you wand some boods?"

I ordered three pairs, though I had only wanted two, and quickly left. I had, I do not know quite what feeling of being part, in his mind, of a conspiracy against him; or not perhaps so much against him as against his idea of boot. One does not, I suppose, care to feel like that; for it was again many months before my next visit to his shop, paid, I remember, with the feeling: "Oh! well, I can't leave the old boy--so here goes! Perhaps it'll be his elder brother!"
For his elder brother, I knew, had not character enough to reproach me, even dumbly.
And, to my relief, in the shop there did appear to be his elder brother, handling a piece of leather.

"Well, Mr. Gessler," I said, "how are you?"

He came close, and peered at me.

"I am breddy well," he said slowly "but my elder brudder is dead."

And I saw that it was indeed himself--but how aged and wan! And never before had I heard him mention his brother. Much shocked; I murmured: "Oh! I am sorry!"

"Yes," he answered, "he was a good man, he made a good bood; but he is dead." And he touched the top of his head, where the hair had suddenly gone as thin as it had been on that of his poor brother, to indicate, I suppose, the cause of death. "He could nod ged over losing de oder shop. Do you wand any hoods?" And he held up the leather in his hand: "Id's a beaudiful biece."

I ordered several pairs. It was very long before they came--but they were better than ever. One simply could not wear them out. And soon after that I went abroad.
It was over a year before I was again in London. And the first shop I went to was my old friend's. I had left a man of sixty, I came back to one of seventy-five, pinched and worn and tremulous, who genuinely, this time, did not at first know me.

"Oh! Mr. Gessler," I said, sick at heart; "how splendid your boots are! See, I've been wearing this pair nearly all the time I've been abroad; and they're not half worn out, are they?"

He looked long at my boots--a pair of Russia leather, and his face seemed to regain steadiness. Putting his hand on my instep, he said: "Do dey vid you here? I 'ad drouble wid dat bair, I remember."

I assured him that they had fitted beautifully.

"Do you wand any boods?" he said. "I can make dem quickly; id is a slack dime."
I answered: "Please, please! I want boots all round--every kind!"

"I will make a vresh model. Your food must be bigger." And with utter slowness, he traced round my foot, and felt my toes, only once looking up to say:

"Did I dell you my brudder was dead?"

To watch him was painful, so feeble had he grown; I was glad to get away.

I had given those boots up, when one evening they came. Opening the parcel, I set the four pairs out in a row. Then one by one I tried them on. There was no doubt about it. In shape and fit, in finish and quality of leather, they were the best he had ever made me. And in the mouth of one of the Town walking-boots I found his bill.

The amount was the same as usual, but it gave me quite a shock. He had never before sent it in till quarter day. I flew down-stairs, and wrote a cheque, and posted it at once with my own hand.
A week later, passing the little street, I thought I would go in and tell him how splendidly the new boots fitted. But when I came to where his shop had been, his name was gone. Still there, in the window, were the slim pumps, the patent leathers with cloth tops, the sooty riding boots.
I went in, very much disturbed. In the two little shops--again made into one--was a young man with an English face.

"Mr. Gessler in?" I said.

He gave me a strange, ingratiating look.

"No, sir," he said, "no. But we can attend to anything with pleasure. We've taken the shop over. You've seen our name, no doubt, next door. We make for some very good people."

"Yes, Yes," I said; "but Mr. Gessler?"

"Oh!" he answered; "dead."

"Dead! But I only received these boots from him last Wednesday week."

"Ah!" he said; "a shockin' go. Poor old man starved 'imself."

"Good God!"

"Slow starvation, the doctor called it! You see he went to work in such a way! Would keep the shop on; wouldn't have a soul touch his boots except himself. When he got an order, it took him such a time. People won't wait. He lost everybody. And there he'd sit, goin' on and on--I will say that for him not a man in London made a better boot! But look at the competition! He never advertised! Would 'ave the best leather, too, and do it all 'imself. Well, there it is. What could you expect with his ideas?"

"But starvation----!"

"That may be a bit flowery, as the sayin' is--but I know myself he was sittin' over his boots day and night, to the very last. You see I used to watch him. Never gave 'imself time to eat; never had a penny in the house. All went in rent and leather. How he lived so long I don't know. He regular let his fire go out. He was a character. But he made good boots."

"Yes," I said, "he made good boots."

And I turned and went out quickly, for I did not want that youth to know that I could hardly see.

‘Doing things one like’ and ‘Liking things one do’

Isn’t there a big difference between ‘Doing things one like’ and ‘liking things one do’? Life always has compromises. What I mean by compromise ‘liking things one do’? Isn’t it a compromise? It is a question I ask to myself very often. My answer so far to the question is ‘Refusal to think’.

I am feared to get the thought of “Do you really doing things you like?”. Somehow I manage to convince myself that ‘Liking the things we do’ is better. One reason being, I find such a difficulty in finding answer to the question: “what I like really?”

This is not the thought which popped up suddenly. It is there in back of my mind for quite some time. Maybe I am thinking of some ideal scenario. Life has to contain both the forms. ‘Doing things I like’ should be more than ‘Liking things one do’.

I am searching for an answer in every aspect of my life. I think I have to break away from my comfort zone.

Vetayadu Vilayadu(வேட்டையாடு விளையாடு)

I watched ‘Vetayadu Vilayadu’ a couple of days back. I expected a lot from the movie: The reason being ‘Kamala Hassan’ (no need to tell the reason) and ‘Gautam Menon’ (after seeing ‘Kakkha Kakkha’). We have heard the same sort of Vendetta story many a times. Gautam Menon is trying to take the direction to more sophisticated level, I guess. I think he achieved it up to some extend. I focused less on other part of the movie. The murders, the way it is done, mostly we see this only in Hollywood. I think it is one good thing (???) about.

Overall it is a pretty normal movie according to my opinion. Jyothika and Kamal Hassan rocked with their acting. No question about that. Jyothika showed lot of maturity in her acting. Also Balaji, who is acting as ‘Amudhan’, one of the serial killers. Violence and blood are much higher than a normal Tamil movie. Lots of bad words usage (It is muted anyway and everybody will understand what is said). Songs are introduced at unwanted places which affects the flow of the movie at times. First half the pace of the movie is so great. Second of it is dead slow and I felt very sleepy.

When it comes to songs, ‘Karkha Karkha’ and ‘Partha Muthal Naal’ are good. Other than that pretty average work by Harris. Background Scores doesn’t gel well with movie. I think ‘Vetayadu Vilayadu’ is a big disappointment.

Me and My priorities

These days it is getting difficult for me to manage my time. I am spending almost 12 hours in office every week days. The reason being, I am new to the technology (J2EE) and new to the IT application. So, I have to put in a bit of extra effort to learn the technology.

Our team has to learn Japanese has well in the weekends. So, weekend half a day is spend for Japanese. Learning a new language is not that easy. So, daily some effort has to be put to remember the Japanese alphabets and words. My experience so far learning a new language is, “Learn a new language in sportive manner”. I think it is the best way. Actually I am Kinder garden kid when it comes to Japanese Language, isn’t it. I cannot be too critical to myself. So, I am enjoying learning Japanese and it is different sort of experience.

Coming back to my priorities, I got one more thing which I am learning for past 2 years in the weekends. My Guitar. Surely, daily practice is required, otherwise, no use in learning it. At least 45 mins to 1 hour of practice is required daily. I am a novice in Guitar. So, I have practice the lessons taught in the class, so that I can play well in the next class. Music cannot be learned by taking it as a burden. It has to be set free. Mind should be free to play the Guitar. I am not forcing myself to take Guitar daily these days. I want to learn it peacefully in my own face. I am learning it for my joy.

I always have a tendency of thinking about too many things. So, I always have lot of things to do. There always a next thing for me. I rarely sit idle. I will always be doing something. I always have this problem of managing time.

I decided to slow down things a bit. I try not to think and do too many things, so that I can do the things more peace fully and enjoy the things better. Let me see, how far I can manage now?